Wednesday, February 27, 2013

so i'm like, a mom now.

wow. who knew so much could happen in one week!

last monday, the 18th of february to be exact, i woke up miserable and still very pregnant. i had doubled in size (due to lovely water retention) over the weekend and even tights didn't fit on my thighs anymore. i looked at ben (after mellow dramatically throwing a pair of jeans across the room) and said,

"i am sooo over this."

and i really was. none of my shoes fit my fat feet anymore, and sleep had become non-existent with the chronic hip pain i had attained over the past 9 months. i would eat a carrot stick and get heart burn, and having to pee 12 billion times a night was less than ideal.

i thought i was going to be pregnant for at least another 9 months...

at least. 

we resumed our day like any other: went to the grocery store, watched the new walking dead episode, and were planning to go see a movie later that night. i decided not to go (i blamed it on being too uncomfortable but really it had more to do with that fact that i had nothing to wear) but told ben he should still go because it probably would be the last time for a long time that he'd be able to go to a movie. before he left, we joked about me going into labor while he was gone, but didn't really think anything of it.

so, ben went to the movies and i sat at home watching old dateline episodes until finally going to bed at around 10:30.

fast forward an hour later...

i woke up to find that i had wet the bed. a little embarrassed, i text ben to ask see where he was. i tried to get up but realized i was still in fact wetting the bed. i couldn't understand why i had lost all control; ya, during the past 9 months i had occasionally "tinkled" after sneezing or laughing too hard, but it had been a long time since i had full-on peed my pants (ok...there was an incident after the halloween dance in grade nine where i just could not hold it any longer and kind of lost it at breanna's house...and she promised me she wouldn't tell anyone but then come monday morning everyone at school knew.) 

(it's not like i'm not bitter or anything...)

anyway, i digress...

it took about 15 minutes for me to come to terms that my water may have broken, but i was still hesitant to go to the hospital and have it turn out to be plain ol' incompetence. so, i called ben and luckily he was out of the movie and just a ten minute drive away. when he got home i told him to examine the damage in the bed, and he agreed that i probably needed to go to the hospital too (i failed to mention the grade nine mishap). so, we loaded up the truck and drove the 5 minutes to rockyview general hospital and were admitted shortly after due to muconeum (aka: POOP) present in the bags of water which meant that the baby might be under distress.

at this point i wasn't feeling any contractions. i had been walking around 3cm dilated for the past week but for the most part had not felt any pain. the doctor said she would give me a few hours to try and get into active labor, but then i would probably have to be induced if i hadn't progressed. so ben and i took a few turns around the hospital wing, sat on the birthing ball, and narrowed down a few baby names that we liked.

by 3am i was only 5cm dilated, so i was hooked up to an IV and given oxytocin to get things going. i was warned in our prenatal class that contractions can come on stronger and much faster once oxytocin is administered but little did i know how true this rang. by 4:30 the contractions were coming on every 30 seconds and as much as i would have liked to have a natural birth (i'm sorry mom, i'm just not as strong as you----i saw you lift a sectional couch and carry it into a house one time; you have brute strength!) by 5 in the morning i was given an epidural and all was well in the world again.

i literally have not felt that comfortable for the past 3 years (being a hygienist you tend to pick up adorable traits like chronic back/neck pain) and wouldn't mind getting an epidural on a regular basis. it was also nice because both ben and i were able to rest until 9:30, when i was told it was time to push.

i don't know if the epidural had worn off at this point, or maybe its sole purpose is just to help with contractions, but during the delivery i swear it wasn't working.

i. felt. every. thing. 11:02am the baby was out and quickly rushed over to the team of doctors ready to suction all the muconeum off so none would be inhaled. the doctors were so efficient and focused in doing this that they failed to mention what the gender of our baby was, so about five minutes later i politely asked what we had had.

"a girl!" they cried, and i was in complete shock. from the beginning i was certain i was having a boy----i just had a feeling! i basically bought all boy clothes and even had a boy name picked out. but when i held that little girl for the first time and she instantly stopped crying, i knew i was supposed to have her.

she was the most beautiful thing i had ever seen, poop-covered and all. i was completely in love with this light-haired, fair-skinned child. that first night in the hospital was rough and even though jane wanted to be fed for what seemed like every 30 minutes, i didn't care. i didn't care that i was absolutely exhausted and in excruciating pain (read: the third-degree tear variety), all i cared about was holding that little girl so close and drinking it all in (not literally...she was still covered in poop).

i can't explain it, but ever since that first day with jane nothing else really matters anymore. i'm more relaxed and feel like i can handle anything that comes my way now. in just one short week, i've become more responsible, more caring, and even more compassionate.

the best thing, though? seeing ben with his little girl. when i first got pregnant he told me that he only wanted boys but i think a girl is exactly what he needed. i would see him with his little nieces and how gentle and kind he was with them, that i secretly prayed every night for 9 months for a girl. he is completely whipped.

and for posterity's sake (and since i'm a terrible record keeper)...

-long! long fingers, long toes, long body.
-alert: every time she opens those squinty eyes of her she's looking around, or staring into my soul.
-eating: in one week she has surpassed her birth weight!
-strong: five minutes after she swam through the birth canal she was trying to hold her head up.
-gassy: poor girl hasn't figured out how to poop properly yet (probably wore herself out from all the pooping she did in-utero!)
-swaddling: this girl won't fall asleep unless she's wrapped as tight as possible.
-wiggly: she seems to wiggle out of any death-grip swaddle.

and lastly, a huge dump of photos from the past week (yep...i'm becoming that mom!):

fresh out of the womb...

after her first bath (she surprisingly loved it!)

loves her bio-dad

gives a mean stink-eye

milk breath

milk-induced coma

loves her new bouncy chair from aunt darla----thanks again! 

welp...we all know who the favorite is in the house...

love those fart-induced smiles! 

favorite view


Morgan Reece said...

Beautiful little girl! Congratulations. You almost had her on my day of birth (18th). Love her little clothes and that green hat. So fun!!!

The Dudleys said...

Congrats Sara! You did it! Isn't it amazing how being a mom changes everything? Ben looks totally smitten in that picture and I can see why she is perfect!

Lauren Bennett said...

You never thought the whole pregnant/birthing process would be worth it until you hold that sweet little baby, hey?! Touching write-up. She's beautiful! Congrats!

Elaine Hearn said...

:) congrats!

MªJosé Fernández said...

Estoy embarazada y me enamorado de las fotos! Acabo de ver tu blog y te sigo! Te invito a visitar el mío estoy con un sorteo de 50€ para gastar en lo que quieras, es fácil participar, te espero �� besitos

kylie said...

oh sarah! I LOVE THIS. so so sweet! i love how you share something so special and sacred and still make me laugh... in the best way. you're the best.

your little jane is a doll. i hope i can meet her someday. i love the words you had to say about motherhood and life as of late. it's really inspiring to me. i can't wait for my turn.


Megan Hollenback said...

oh i love your birth story! that is so awesome. totally can relate to how amazing it is having a baby. jane is adorable and i love that name! thanks for sharing :)

Cole and Paige Barnett said...

Loved your birth story!